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Wagner’s music is better than it sounds.
– Mark Twain
A horse! A horse! My kingdom for a horse!
– Wm. Shakespeare, “Henry VI”

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Learn to pause — or nothing worthwhile can catch up to you.
You will lose your present job and have to become a door to door mayonnaise
salesman.

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Try to get all of your posthumous medals in advance.
You have a strong desire for a home and your family interests come first.

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Are you a turtle?
You will be awarded some great honor.

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Truth will out this morning. (Which may really mess things up.)
Q: What’s tiny and yellow and very, very, dangerous?
A: A canary with the super-user password.

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You’ll never see all the places, or read all the books, but fortunately,
they’re not all recommended.
You will be surprised by a loud noise.

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You have an unusual understanding of the problems of human relationships.
Your talents will be recognized and suitably rewarded.

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You will be run over by a bus.
You have the body of a 19 year old. Please return it before it gets wrinkled.

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Man is the only animal that blushes — or needs to.
– Mark Twain
Tomorrow, you can be anywhere.

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You will always get the greatest recognition for the job you least like.
An honest tale speeds best being plainly told.
– William Shakespeare, “Henry VI”